My Social Life is Fucked

Hi darlings,

Ali, you ask, why are you posting today and why is your title so vulgar?  Well, I’m trying to finish a blog post for school on another website and jammin out to some electronic music since there are no lyrics and it helps me focus when a whole pile o’ shit is dumped in my inbox.  Basically, my social group is falling apart.

I know, I know, I always make posts to procrastinate my homework, but this time my life is taking my homework away from me and shoving me into this shit show.  Two weeks ago, just after my final year of this hell hole began, two of my friends got in a fight.  It was over a boy naturally.  Anna and Angela were hanging out one day after school.  Little did they know they were both texting the same boy.  Angela had just gotten out of a bad breakup and wanted to feel companionship with John.  Lemme just say he is NOT the kinda guy you wanna turn to to feel cared for.  He is a douchenozzle and I am the only one that sees the true affect of his asshat ways.  So Angela realizes that she feels some inkling of feelings for John and decided to tell him right out.  He replies with a long message that seemed to be sentimental, until Angela recognized that he wasn’t reacting with the same feelings, but with stronger ones.  Towards Anna.  He said that he was trying to get over her using Angela, but he just couldn’t.  The worst part of it is that Anna knew and was taking it to her advantage.  She told Angela that she hoped that Angela would get John off of her back for a little while until Anna could properly juggle the THREE MEN she had on the hook.  So Angela walked away feeling vulnerable and used by two of the people closest to her.  Then she turned to me because she knew no one else would listen to what she had to say about the incident.  Anna pulled everyone to her side by having all the guys interested and keeping her like minded friends close (that means other manipulative, cheating, morally twisted, teenage girls).

Four days ago, Angela decided that she overreacted (which she didn’t) and wanted to apologize and work out what went wrong with everything.  So she and Anna made up and are back to being the best of friends.  There is still a sense of awkwardness, but that is because both of them are back to flirting shamelessly with John.

There is a new development though.  Today a group of us went to the strip mall and Angela told me of her plans to meet up with John later and hook up since her Friends-With-Benefits relationship just ended.  Angela actually forgot about meeting up with him and her phone had died so I thought we were getting off scott clean and my social circle wouldn’t dissolve.  But no, John showed up anyways and things got “sexual” according to Angela.  She now trusts me not to tell anyone about what happened but I am just so pissed off!  My social life was already in shambles, but now its crumbling around me and its only September!  I have to deal with these people until I graduate in June and I don’t think I can do it with the way everyone seems to be self destructing and trying to launch themselves out of the friend group.  Who am I kidding?  we aren’t friends anymore.  We are just a group of people too caught in formalities to cut off each other.  It is so toxic sometimes I can’t breathe when I am around them.  Someone please get me out of here.

-Ali

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